Unknown's avatar

About ogresan

Richard Parks' stories have have appeared in Asimov's SF, Realms of Fantasy, Fantasy Magazine, Weird Tales, and numerous anthologies, including several Year's Bests. His first story collection, THE OGRE'S WIFE, was a finalist for the World Fantasy Award. He is the author of the Yamada Monogatari series from Prime Books.

Publisher’s Giveaway

WRITING 02I didn’t do it this time. Prime Books has arranged for a giveaway for two Prime Books editions: The War God’s Son, but also Word Puppets by Mary Robinette Kowal. Go here to enter. Deadline is November 24th for Word Puppets and November 25th for The War God’s Son.

I may be scarce for a few days. I’m back in Mississippi to help finish packing for the move, and then to transport the rest of our household back to Upstate. I’ll try to get back on something as close to an even keel as I ever manage once we’re settled. However long that takes.

Words have power. You can tell, because in the wake of the tragedies in Paris and Beirut and Baghdad, so many people are misusing them. Sad and angry as I might be at the moment, I want to think about that for a bit before I say anything.

How Many People Does it Take to Remove a 400lb Radiator?

IMG_0402And it’s no joke.

The answer is four—one who knows how to disconnect it and three who know how to move it. I’m talking about one of the old-fashioned hot water heat radiators apparently still very common in Upstate. It’s all new to me. I come from a place where we either had woodstoves or butane gas (flame) heaters in every room. Then, later, central air and heat. Only Upstate is not so big on the central air (in Mississippi, where the heat seldom drops below mid 70’s at night in summer and below 90-95 during the day, A/C was a matter of survival. Here, well, we’ll see). Yet in the relatively short time I’ve been here, I’ve come to appreciate the old radiator heating system. No hot air blowing on you and drying everything out. Heating oil is expensive but then so is the power for an electric furnace. One drawback is that radiators take up floor space, but not necessarily huge amounts.

There was, however, one exception. You take a right turn from our front door and there is the the landing for the stairs. There was also this monster of a radiator, bigger than any other one in the house, so big that you practically had to squeeze by it to get to the stairs. We couldn’t figure it out. It didn’t produce more heat than the others, and what it did went up the stairwell. Only, hot air rises so it was going to do that anyway. Consulted with plumber who knows these systems, found out he was as baffled as we were. Took up huge amount of room. Made no difference or sense. Had to go. Easier said than done. Disconnecting it was no big deal. The piping to complete the water loop under the floor had to be linked, also no biggie.

Removing the radiator? Biggie. It easily weighed four hundred pounds and the two of us couldn’t move it more than few feet. Fortunately, the plumber guy knew a guy, who brought a couple strapping lads with him. Together they managed to get the thing out the door and down the hill to a trailer to haul it away. The wooden porch and steps barely supported it. They had to slide it down the bank because there was no way to take it down all the stairs without killing themselves. So it’s gone. Heat still works. Which is good, ’cause that thing ain’t coming back. I can’t imagine how anyone got it there in the first place. Or why.

It was a bit of a bummer to be within sixty miles of where the World Fantasy Con was being held this year in Saratoga Springs and not being able to go. As I’ve said before, I’m not huge on conventions these days, but I’d make an exception for WFC. It’s one of the best.

Thanks to everyone who participated in the ebook giveaway for Hereafter, and After. It’s still one of my favorite stories. If this raises its visibility even a little, it will have been worth it. If it doesn’t, well, lesson learned.

Ebook Giveaway — Hereafter, and After

Hereafter, and After2Starting Wednesday, November 4th and ending on Friday, November 6th, the Kindle ebook edition of my novella, Hereafter, and After, normally $2.99, will be available for the special price of nothing, nada, & bupkis. My warped view of what allegedly comes after the mortal coil thing. Heaven, Hell, plus the Twilight of the Gods, all in one story. Introduction by the esteemed Andy Duncan. Seriously, you’d pass that up?

Reporting From Upstate

IMG_0377Don’t you hate it when someone gives you the “I know something you don’t know. It’s really cool, but I can’t tell you.” That one? Well, this one is sort of like that one—I’ve seen the preliminary cover art (by Alegion) for The Emperor in Shadow. It’s pretty much done, but I can’t show it to you just yet, so you’ll have to take my word for it that it is indeed very cool, in my opinion the best cover on the series so far. And I’ve seen it and you can’t. Don’t you just hate that? Don’t you wish I’d just curl up and DIE? Or worse, send me to the Harmony Hut? Your call. I’ll be over here fretting about something else entirely. I got a million of ’em.

I’ve been sleeping on a thin quilted pad with a quilted quilt over me for the last two weeks as I’ve attempted to get the new house sorted before the move. I rather fancy the experience mimics that of the way the Heian (and a lot of other era) Japanese slept, with a roll up futon for a bed and their clothes or blankets as covers in however many layers the season required. It’s at once uncomfortable to someone used to a western-style bed and yet I sleep very well, to my own surprise. Almost too well, sometimes. Things to do.

A contact in Belgium has licensed non-exclusive French Language rights to translate “Cherry Blossoms on the River of Souls” into, yes, French. Looking forward to seeing it, even though I can’t read French. It’s just the idea. So far I’ve had stories translated into Russian, French, Chinese, and Japanese. Germany and the Latin and Nordic countries remain holdouts. If anyone in those countries would like to read anything of mine in their native language, bug your local publisher. They’re in charge of those things, not me.

Announcing a Contest

WarGod-600

I received the official word from Audible.com that Yamada Monogatari: The War God’s Son is available in audiobook format (I know some of you were already aware of this fact). What you didn’t know is that they also just sent me some one-time codes for a free copy of the audio version. More than I can use, actually, so rather than let them go to waste, I thought I’d try to give some of those who read this blog a shot at one.

I haven’t done many of these, but a contest seemed the fairest way, so if any of you are interested, let’s have one. Below the next paragraph is the “official” description of the book at Amazon, or B&N, etc. Some of you may have even seen it, but what you might not know is that the listing contains a typographical error. That is, a rather important word is spelled wrong. I’ve been assured that it will be corrected, but you know how these things work—once it’s on the internet, the genie is out of the bottle. Chances are it’ll always be there, somewhere.

So here’s what I’ll do—to the first person who spots the mistake and sends me an email (you know how to translate this: ogresan(at)gmaildotcom )correctly identifying the error, I will send a free coupon code good for one copy of the audiobook version of Yamada Monogatari: The War God’s Son, marvelously narrated by Brian Nishii, along with instructions for using that coupon (not complicated, but for those who aren’t familiar with Audible.com, probably helpful). I’m not going to claim that there is ONLY one mistake in the listing, but keep in mind that I am looking for a very specific one, and the decision of the judge–me–is final:

“The Abe clan and its allies are in full rebellion. When the Emperor’s greatest military leader, Yoshii, is targeted for assassination by magic, it is up to the newly sober Lord Yamada and his exorcist associate Kenji to keep the young man alive long enough to put down the uprising before the entire country is consumed by war. Yamada knows how to deal with demons, monsters, and angry ghosts, but the greatest threat of all is one final assassin, hidden in a place where no one—especially Lord Yamada—would ever think to look.”